KELLER, TX—Calling the new policy a “necessary” safety measure, administrators from Keller Independent School District confirmed Friday that all students were now required to use clear bags in order to prevent them from bringing in books. “As we start the new school year, we’d like to remind students that all backpacks must be clear or mesh so that we can ensure you are not smuggling any educational materials onto campus grounds,” read a statement from the board of trustees, which warned students that they would also be subject to unannounced locker searches in collaboration with the local police department’s K9 book-detection unit. “Under our zero-tolerance policy, any novel brought onto school grounds will result in the offending student’s expulsion. Paraphernalia like bookmarks, highlighters, and library cards will be immediately confiscated. And don’t think you can get away with hiding a paperback in your pocket, either. We will not hesitate to conduct a strip search.” At press time, all schools in the area had gone into lockdown after someone reportedly entered a junior high carrying a copy of The Giver.