Experts Link Poor Posture To Accurate Understanding Of Self-Worth

CLEVELAND, OH—Uncovering a relationship between an arched spine and one’s innermost feelings, experts at Cleveland Clinic reportedly found a link Tuesday between poor posture and an accurate understanding of self-worth. “According to our data, there is a distinct connection between a slouch in someone’s back and a clear-eyed recognition of their own fundamental worth as a human being,” said head researcher Dr. Murray Shapiro, explaining those with lower hunches more correctly comprehend how much their life actually matters. “It’s striking how accurately you can predict whether someone truly grasps their real place on this planet by how slumped over they always are. A lifetime of bearing the knowledge of their standing in the world is also why you see many elderly with severely stooped backs.” Shapiro added that people can sometimes even be left bedridden if they get too clear a comprehension of their self respect.