KANSAS CITY, MO—In an effort to rally his teammates, Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce reportedly delivered an inspiring halftime speech Sunday about what sex with Taylor Swift was like. “We were all sitting there feeling weary, and Travis could tell, so he just stood up and started telling us what it’s like to have sex with Taylor Swift, and you could feel the mood in the locker room completely change,” said Chiefs backup quarterback Blaine Gabbert, adding that Kelce looked each player in the eye as he delivered a few rousing sentences about what it’s like to give oral sex to Swift. “Guys were slamming their hands into their lockers and cheering, it was incredible. But that’s just the kind of guy Travis is—he can see when players need someone to stand up and discuss at length what the experience of intercourse with Taylor Swift is really like.” Following the speech, the exuberant Chiefs reportedly bounded out of the locker room for the second half chanting, “Sex! Sex! Sex!”