Michelle Obama Fuming After Barack Also Titles New Memoir ‘Becoming’

WASHINGTON—Calling the discovery “unbelievable,” Michelle Obama was reportedly fuming Friday after learning Barack Obama had also titled his new memoir Becoming. “I know I don’t own a trademark on the word ‘becoming,’ but what the fuck, Barack?” said the former first lady, who was bewildered after coming across an advanced reading copy of her husband’s latest book hidden under a pile of clutter on his desk. “Was he going to tell me or was he just going to wait for me to see it at the store? He even has his chin on his hand, Jesus Christ. It’s not like he can claim ignorance on this one either because he read mine and assured me that he liked it. This is why he kept giving me all those suggestions like ‘you should call it Me, Myself, Michelle.’ That goddamn son of a bitch.” At press time, Michelle Obama was calling her husband’s cell phone after noticing a glowing blurb on the book jacket attributed to her that she had never written.