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HomeSportsMLB Announcer Unsure Why He Currently Stating Pitcher’s Birth Weight

MLB Announcer Unsure Why He Currently Stating Pitcher’s Birth Weight

PHOENIX—Midway through an anecdote during a break in the action in the World Series, MLB announcer Joe Davis revealed Monday that he was unsure why he was currently stating the pitcher’s birth weight. “Of course, you need to consider that [Arizona Diamondbacks pitcher Brandon] Pfaadt was eight pounds and two ounces when he was born, so—wait, why do we need to consider that? Why am I talking about this?” the incredulous announcer said as color analyst John Smoltz shrugged in confusion, the two men appearing utterly dumbstruck when a graphic comparing Pfaadt’s birth weight to that of former Diamondbacks pitcher Curt Schilling suddenly appeared onscreen. “Pfaadt weighs 220 pounds now, and he’s 6'4", so he’s a pretty big guy and throws hard, but then he only weighed 86 pounds when he was 10 years old, although I don’t understand why that’s relevant. Why am I saying this? Why do I have Brandon Pfaadt’s lifetime weight history in front of me? No one really needs to know this, do they? [Texas Rangers shortstop] Corey Seager only weighed seven pounds, nine ounces when he was born, which is less than Pfaadt, and Seager is from Charlotte, NC, which could have an impact on the matchup we’re watching at the plate, but I kind of doubt it. If you put the whole Diamondbacks team together they would weigh 4,940 pounds, which is…fine? Pfaadt was born at the University of Louisville Hospital for Women and Infants, and a couple of the guys on the Rangers were born through Cesarean section… Why am I saying these things? What kind of knowledge is this? Hello? Can anyone hear me?” At press time, Smoltz had interrupted Davis to offer the insight that the pitcher is the one who throws the ball toward home plate.

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