Judd Apatow Criticized For Nepotism After Casting Own Sperm To Star In New Movie

LOS ANGELES—Calling the choice both lazy and uninspired, top film reviewers criticized Judd Apatow for nepotism Monday after the director and producer cast his own sperm to star in his new movie, The Bubble. “Rather than cast a wide net and discover new talent, Judd Apatow has once again decided to rely on those close to him, choosing actors plucked directly from his own testicles,” Los Angeles Times critic David Freeman wrote in a scathing review, adding that while Apatow’s sperm cells were hilarious and clearly had a natural penchant for physical comedy, it still didn’t excuse the fact that he failed to look any farther than his own ejaculate when casting the film. “Yes, they had great chemistry with Keegan-Michael Key, and yes, their flagellum slaps were perfectly timed, but that doesn’t excuse the fact that they came from the ballsack of Hollywood royalty. You can say you’re objective and that your sperm earned the role, but how can you not be biased when you cranked them straight out of your penis, into a tissue, and then onto the big screen?” At press time, Apatow reportedly laughed off any accusation of nepotism after his sperm signed with Creative Artists Agency.