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Nation Sees Fundamental Realignment In Which Voting Demographics Should Be Demonized

WASHINGTON—Describing the previous night’s results as a shocking transformation in their understanding of the electorate, political analysts told reporters Wednesday night that the 2020 election represented a fundamental realignment in which voting demographics should be demonized. “Frankly, these results reveal nothing less than a massive sea change of who political parties blame for all of this nation’s problems,” said Stanford University polling expert Harry Mills, noting the Republican Party’s historic steps towards creating a diverse multiracial coalition would have repercussions for decades to come in how it alters the understanding of electoral scapegoats. “Of course, liberal politicians have been edging toward blaming Cubans and Jewish Americans for their problems for years. But no one ever expected they would be able to vilify them so quickly—and certainly not alongside such a broad assortment of minority strawmen like Black men and homosexuals. Where once it was common sense that Democrats only needed to say non-college-educated whites were bigots voting against their own self-interest, it now seems they’ll also need to pin electoral failures on Hispanics who refuse to use the term Latinx. It’s a stunning development.” At press time, the Democratic Party had used preliminary analyses of the election’s outcome to draft a series of outcomes telling Latinos how badly they had botched the election for the rest of us.

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